Not the Average American Family

Not the Average American Family

My family would not be considered “normal” by societal standards because I am an unmarried African American single mother. I have three children and I have been a parent since I was sixteen. I was not trying to become a single parent at the age of sixteen but I did so there is no use over crying over spilt milk as the old folks would say. Hell, I have been called “Momma” for so long that when I am in a grocery store and hear a child say “Momma”, I automatically look around even though my children are at home.

I think that I have been a good mother but not a perfect one. Hell no mother is perfect. I was just a child when I had my eldest daughter and if it was not for my mother; God knows what would have happened to me and my baby girl. I eventually had two more children and my little family of four means everything to me.

I love when we have family meetings in my bedroom discussing everything from politics to Facebook drama. All of my children are opinionated as hell and I love it because you cannot be a wimp in this society because people will step on you like a cockroach.

As a single mother, I had the pleasure of seeing my eldest children walk across the stage as high school graduates. I take pride in those accomplishments because according statistics, children of teen mothers will drop out of school, start breeding the next generation of bastard children, and become natural born killers. Not true at all; it depends on the teen mother. I would never sit back passively and allow my children to become statistics of the streets.

My first little birdie flew the coop in two years ago and has her own apartment. I am so proud of her! She has been working since she was fifteen-years-old and she has more work ethic than some forty somethings I know. She managed to keep a 4.0 in high school while working a part-time job and when she graduated, she was a member of the National Honor Society. I cried buckets of tears last year when I saw her walk across the stage to receive her Bachelor’s degree. That’s my Nu-Nu.

My son is a remarkable young man. He has never caused me a moment of grief since he was born. I can say emphatically that my son is a good kid. At an age when a lot of young brothers are hanging out on street corners causing havoc and chaos in inner city communities, he still picks his little sister up from cheer-leading practice. This marvelous child of mine elected not to go on prom on the premise that he was not interested in “girlie” stuff like that, but I think he did not go because he knew his mother could not afford to send him on prom.

My little one is my clinger. She refuses to sleep by herself and insists on sleeping with me. She rubs on my rolls and tells me to never lose weight because my fat is soft and warm. Before I started wearing locs, she used to say that my Afro was a beautiful cloud and still believes that I am the most beautiful mommy in the world. She loves me unconditionally and wholeheartedly and my life would be so empty with her.

As stated earlier, I did not plan on becoming a single mother but I love my children and as long as my children are alive and breathing, I would do anything for them. They are the best part of me and I have no regrets.

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I am a woman. I am an African-American. Belonging to two minorities has shaped my viewpoint on life in more ways than I can count. It is not easy being a woman in an inherently sexist society. Add skin color to the equation and you have me. This is my world and my viewpoint. You do not have to agree with my thoughts but in the end, you will respect me

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